Hello, Lovers. . .
In light of Valentine’s month, I began thinking about what many of the people I work with have brought to our sessions. Many ask. . . How can I become a more creative lover?
So I ask you. . . Would you like to enhance your lovemaking with more creativity, spontaneity, and play?
I understand that all in all human intimacies, an openness to creativity is grounded in spontaneity, curiosity, and intuitive guidance. The bonding between ourselves and our partners is woven by a visceral and mentally openness, and this gifts us the luscious feeling of fulfillment we all hope to experience in lovemaking.
How do we find that creative space within when engaging in lovemaking?
Creativity is a state of being. A space where you leave the plans, the tasking, the goals and the judgements (of self and other) behind. By sinking into a visceral connection to your body’s internal sensations, and following the path while this kind of intuitive awareness guides you, you will feel your mind stretch, find yourself opening to new and exciting things. In this space, you will find yourself engaging with an energy that allows you to drop into the vast realm of creative engagement, spontaneous action, grounded in a deep curiosity for what is unfolding, rather than a planned out, or control oriented approach. This is Tantra. Breath and relax, find your inner balance, feel your beautiful inner sensations, and allow creativity to guide you.
You may ask. . . what exactly makes me creative? Are some people born creative, or is it a skill that I can develop, much like a muscle?
. . . Well, some people do have a deeper attunement to their internal, sensuality, spontaneity, and curiosity. This would make a person naturally more creative. But, in reality, we all have these aspects to our state of being, some are just closer to these parts of themselves than others. You can learn to become a more creative lover by incorporating a few creative practices into your daily life. I promise.
❤️Would you like to learn some of these techniques?
Here are some thoughts from Dakini Oceana at Sensual By Nature Studio. . .
1. A creative lover brings a great deal of presence, both physical and mental, to the sensual play of loving. In a creative loving zone, you will want to slow into spending time and attention on a single moment, a single act, a single piece of skin, or undressing, or washing, or caressing. . . And in this realm you remain completely excited by this exploration, enthusiastic all the while.
Tip: To cultivate this presence, you may want to enhance you imagination and curiosity by spending time cultivating self awareness, quietly thinking and reflecting on the things that ignite your passion, and peak your interest.
2. Creativity isn’t so much about being intellectually smart or cunning. Spontaneity, creativity, and intuitive guidance involves a beautiful blend of wisdom and childishness. You want to cultivate your sense of wonder, and openness to looking at the world with fresh eyes, feeling into your surroundings and finding a sense of wonderment in it all. A lightheartedness and excitement is a major asset to approaching lovemaking with a creative passion, while remaining present, focused and excited to find the ultimate highest peaks in each moment explored. . .
Tip: Throughout the day allow yourself to daydream. . . This helps to open your mind to new ideas, new thoughts, new feelings. This exercises the parts of your being that are related to experience, letting go of tasking and linear thought. Allow yourself to simply move into your daydream, imagining the possibilities and wonders of the world, without judging whether they are possible in reality or ok to even consider! It’s a daydream, stretch your mind. . . Trust that you can immerse themselves in imagination and fantasy, yet remain grounded in reality. When you enter the realm of lovemaking, you will find that this “dreamer” part of you gets an opportunity to really stretch long. . . You will be so breathlessly surprised by how you begin to engage with your partner in imaginative and new ways, that are immersed in a leap into a world that is different from the usual “present,” taking you beyond and into a new realm of sensuality, which can become your new reality.
3. A creative lover is engaging with themselves internally while remaining completely present to the other. A rather introverted and extroverted state of being. You can combine both. This is much of what we practice in Tantra.
Tip: You can practice this throughout the day. Learning to remain connected to your internal body energy, your sensual flow, through breath and internal awareness, while allow the person you are talking to, engaging with, touching and loving, to completely enter your being. This happens when you allow yourself to be fully present with open curiosity and wonderment to a deep reception of the other. In turn, you can also practice remaining fully engaged in giving generously, so that you are not only involved in your own body sensations, but deeply guided to flow with allowing that energy to move through you into giving, touching, and becoming excited, enamoured by the excitement you bring to them. Here, you can aware of the space that you share, and are co creating together. You are bearing witness to this totally spontaneous moment, rather than comparing. Here, you are seeking to create moments through spontaneity, presence, imagination and joy, letting go of all that has occurred in the past or seeking a goal for the future.
4. Try to remain somewhat androgynous in lovemaking. By this I mean, try to let go of what you perceive a male role and what you perceive a female role. Certainly you may tend toward some traits, as often the man holds the frame while the woman is the painting, but truly you can both be both, regardless of gender, if you share the space in a co creative way.
Further, in Tantra practice we seek to develop both our male and female sides, as this allows us to feel both our own frame and our own painting, so we don’t depend on the other to feel whole, but rather we effectively double our repertoire of responses. This means being open, receptive, sensual and focused, grounded in the moment and giving.
Tip: Throughout the day, allow yourself to begin to think “out of the box.” This will translate into your lovemaking experience and expression. You can draw from past experiences, while remaining open to new ways of perceiving and innovating the experience of making love.
5. Most importantly, seek to remain passionate. Passionate toward the moment, passionate to the commitment to openness, passionate toward feeling each and every sensation. . . Here you find yourself in a deeply Sensitive space, Open to Experience, and passionately Happy and Joyful to simply be there, loving and engaging in this realm of expansive creative space, so unlike the daily task of life for most.cone up with new ideas, take risks, and don’t be afraid to communicate with your partner about what you are experiencing, and being open to hearing from them what they are experiencing. We learn so much from one another, when we remain open and curious to understanding the other, rather than taking offense or getting hurt if their experience isn’t the same as yours or what you wanted to hear.
Tip: Throughout each day, make a commitment to learning and growing through how you perceive each event and circumstance. This translates into sensual and lovemaking experiences. Each and every moment is a true gift, and sensuality and lovemaking are an even more profound gift from the universe. Sensuality and lovemaking allow you to expand beyond the confines of day to day life. Honor sensuality and lovemaking as a sacred space where you can give over. When sensuality and lovemaking are your creative inspiration, you can let go of routines, and instead find the childlike curiosity, deep pleasure and bonding. Here you can find nature, music, dance, romance, in a passionate creativity and a flow of newfound experiences . .
❤️We all crave this, yes? . . . This realm of sensuality and lovemaking is where spirituality and sensuality can meet. . . And this open flow can take us to new places. . . Committing to learning to become open to your creative self, and thus creating new experience is a source of great joy. Committing to becoming a more sensually alive, creative lover can bring you tremendous happiness, and much vitality. Beautiful flowing sensuality and lovemaking gift your human experience with profound health, and natural energy. All inside of you awakens when you allow yourself to explore and flow in this realm. . .we are all sensual by nature.
Valentine’s Love from Oceana . . . “Let lovemaking, sensuality, body awakening, and spiritual bonding be your adult space to play!”
Celebrate Ero’s Gifts in all you do. . . I invite you to Visit Sensual by Nature Studio to explore, awaken, heal and develop your natural sensual self.